Day 6

Day 6-Support

As an adoptive parent, the support we had during our adoption and immediately after returning home is a very precious gift that continues to touch my heart to this day. The friends and family that prayed for us, gave financially, sorted garage sale donations, and sent encouraging notes are so dear to me. Upon returning home, the house filled with meals, new toys for kids, errands completed for us, and the shared joy of our newest addition continued to be such a blessing. And we know that not every adoptive family receives such generous and loving support and it makes me all the more thankful for that tribe that surrounded us.

Support looks different now. A few close friends have chosen to stay near to us as we wade through the messiness of adoption. They have received a front row seat to trauma and orphanage behaviors and their toll on a family. Yet they have remained. And that support is invaluable. There are BTDT adoptive and special needs mamas who have offered a brave “me too” when I’ve had a moment of courage to ask for help or solidarity. And these ladies’ “me toos” brings more strength than I even imagined possible. The friends who accept our kids as they are and see them as precious regardless of what attitude they are currently wearing is soul-lifting. And the friend that says “This is really hard. I have wine.” and is willing to laugh at the absurdity and cry at the brokenness moments apart is the kind of support that I will always cherish.

And support has a new meaning for my kiddo too. Its the teachers, the therapists, the speech pathologists, the resource specialists, the sunday school teachers, and the countless other individuals who choose to interact with my family in kindness and compassion. When they show me they truly care and love my daughter and want the best for her- what more could I ask for. We don’t always see eye to eye, yet I try to appreciate the work that they do and the love that they bring to the table.

My take away from this post is that there are lots of ways to be involved in orphan care- and playing a support role can have a greater impact than you might ever be aware of. Maybe foster care or adoption isn’t the path God has called your family on. But I bet there are adoptive families in your circle that you could reach out to. Bring food, or wine. Coffee is always good too. Look their children in the eye, overlook their behavior, and smile at them. Don’t assume the outside appearance is true- there may be a child or a mama or a sibling who is dangling by a string and could really use a friend. And you could probably spare a moment of kindness and start a ripple effect of hope and strength for a new day.